Maybe It's Making my Breasts Look Larger...
A lady at work today told me I was wasting away and becoming a waif. I told her to get her eyes checked. Really, though, the cease-and-desist on junk food/sweets seems to have whittled me down a size and a half to which I say...score!* No-effort weight loss is just hunky dory, and it gets easier with each day. Plus, I get to hear stuff like this scenario which happened last week:Male I Haven't Seen In 9 Months: Wow. You look great.
Moi: Thanks.
MIHSI9M: No, really. You've lost a LOT of weight haven't you?
Moi: Um, well, some...but I wouldn't characterize it as a LOT.
MIHSI9M: Well, you look really good.
MIHSI9M (20 minutes later): Can I get your phone number again? I lost it a few months ago.
Moi (thinking to self): No way asshole. It's not as if I went from 1050 pounds to 118.
Moi (aloud): Sure. (Gives phone number with a few wrong digits. Sucker.)
That was fun. And yes, wrong too, I know. Whip me for it, ok?
Of course, since yesterday was the end of Lent, I indulged by having two Girl Scout cookies and a few (too many) rum & cokes. Today, I feel like crap. Attribute most of it to the late Sunday night, but I also have a sneaking suspicion that the re-introduction of sugar is why the stomach is roiling** today. Learned that lesson pretty fast. Note to self: Do not re-pollute what you struggled to cleanse.
Hmm...my liver should probably be next in line, but it's lounging in the corner nursing a whiskey on the rocks. Lazy bastard.
*Unfortunately, that means I have to go shopping.
**Sigh...I love that word. Also: mitigate, eschew and copacetic. Rawr...
picked from the vine by sv @ 3:12 PM
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